NFL Week 13 Picks – By HefferBrew

fnLiq.St.5

 

Dustin: Bills- Both these teams suck, make no mistake about it. As a Bills fan, this could be my last stand, the Jags are down to their third-string running back, second string quarterback and WR Cecil Shorts may not be playing due to a hamstring injury, this is a game the Bills should seem destined to win, let’s hope they don’t Bills-it-up on us. Bills – 24, Jags – 13.

Cameron: Jaguars – The emergance of Chad Henne as a viable option in Jax has people in the panhandle psyched. That’s a lie. I just hope the Bills are wise enough to tank it from here on out so they won’t end up with a middle of the pack type pick. Jags – 27, Bills – 24. 

Dustin: Bears- With Smokin’ Jay Cutler back under center, the Bears look as formidable as ever. They absolutely destroyed the Vikings last weekend and face a sliding Seahawks team. Their top-tier D and explosive offense should prove too much to handle. Bears – 28, Seahawks – 19.

Cameron: Bears – The Seahawks aren’t playing at home so that usually means they lose. Bears – 45, Hawks – 20.

Dustin: Lions- This next sentence is purely the fantasy football player in me speaking; Matt Stafford will throw 400 yards and 4 TDs, including one he throws to himself for an 80 yard score, and for good measure, he’ll run two in as well. More likely, this will be an offensive showcase for both teams with the Lions D doing just enough to hassle Andrew Luck. Lions – 35, Colts – 31.

Cameron: Colts – One team is actually competing for something other then racking up stats in garbage time in sad efforts at comebacks. Welcome back to the suck Detroit, we missed you. Colts – 30, Lions – 27.

Dustin: Packers- They got crushed last Sunday night by the Giants, I don’t assume that sat too well with anyone on the team, I’m fully expecting them to come out and obliterate the Vikings and their remaining games in a fury of vengeance. Packers – 34, Vikings – 21.

Cameron: Packers – Remember in September to October when Vikings/Packers looked like a changing of the guard game for the Vikings and the NFC North? Now this game looks like a for sure three team teaser even though the Vikings are a nine point underdog. I fully expect the nine to be covered by GB. Packers – 38, Vikings – 19.

Dustin: Panthers- I like to call this game “How Cam Newton Got His Groove Back 2.” Panthers – 27, Chiefs – 17.

Cameron: Panthers – I personally feel this game shouldn’t be played and for moral reasons I won’t make any jokes at the expense of any players in this game. The thoughts and prayers of us here at HefferBrew go out to the families involved with the tragedy that befell the Kansas City Chiefs organization this morning. Panthers 21, Chiefs – 9.

Dustin: Patriots- Remember that ideal fantasy description for the Lions game? Tom Brady will probably actually have that game against the Dolphins. Patriots – 42, Dolphins – 17.

Cameron: Patriots – Ditto to the point above. Pats – 49, Fins- 10.

Dustin: Cardinals- If only because I felt it’d be a cop out to pick Tie. Cardinals – 7, Jets – 6.

Cameron: Jets – If you want an opinion on this go watch a pee-wee football game and you’ll see what will happen on Sunday. Jets – 14, Cardinals – 6.

Dustin: 49ers- Colin Kaepernick looks like Vin Diesel and I can’t bet against the Diesel. Since he took over, the 49ers have resumed looking like the unstoppable machine from earlier in the season. Yes, the QB controversy could come back to bite them in the playoffs but for now, I’m just gonna Harbaugh-it and go with the hot hand. 49ers – 27, Rams – 20.

Cameron: 49ers – No ties this time. Niners – 42, Rams – 7.

Dustin: Texans- The past few weeks, the Texans have looked softer on defense than they have in two years, the offense has seemed to hit stride and bail them out though. Therefore, I call this game “Tyler Perry’s How the Texans D Got Their Groove Back” starring Chris Johnson. Texans – 27, Titans – 3.

Cameron: Titans – First off, Dustin, you can’t use the same joke twice and second,  UPSET SPECIAL! I fully expect the Texans to take this game off. They’ve played way to much football over the span of two weeks and on top of that a solid majority of their defense if hurt. CJ2K rushed for 144 yards the last time these two teams played and I expect him to do it again, especially with my thinking of the Texans taking the day off, he’ll also probably get a touchdowns this time. Titans – 24, Texans – 17.

Dustin: Broncos- The Broncos have pulled out comeback wins this season, Tampa Bay has not been able to hold leads, I think the Bucs take a lead to the two minute warning but get Manning’d in the end by the likely MVP. Broncos – 28, Bucs – 27.

Cameron: Broncos – I don’t see Peyton having a good game in this one and I see it being one big defensive showcase. Broncos – 16, Bucs – 12.

Dustin: Ravens- Joe Flacco is terrible, but he’s not Charlie Batch, so the Ravens have that going for them. The Ravens D should be bracing for a feast. Ravens – 21, Steelers – 13.

Cameron: Ravens – After reports of Ben Roethis-whatever maybe playing i debated on whether the Steelers could pull out the win. Ben isn’t playing so there’s no chance in hell the Ravens lose. Ravens – 13, Steelers – 6.

Dustin: Raiders- This game is going to be the Christmas Day of Craptastic Power Rankings, good luck choosing Cameron, there’s plenty of options here. Raiders – 13, Browns – 12.

Cameron: Raiders – I’m guessing on this one, really no expertise behind it. Raiders – 24, Browns – 21.

Dustin: Bengals- The Bengals are exactly what many expected them to be; a team with offense for days and flashes of defensive greatness. The Chargers are not anywhere near what they were thought to be; a contender. Bengals – 24, Chargers – 17.

Cameron: Bengals – The Chargers suck and are essentially the real life version of Lenny from “Of Mice and Men”. They think they’re doing good and then they just go and break the neck of your wife. Bengals – 35, Chargers – 13.

Dustin: Cowboys- Eagles suck. Cowboys – 31, Eagles – 20.

Cameron: Eagles – It’s getting close to the final stops on the Andy Reid farewell tour. What better way to solidify your legacy then shit all over the other guy who’s essentially in the same hot seat as you. Andy Reid will beat Jason Garrett with his backups. It’s gonna be awesome. Eagles – 27, Cowboys – 17.

Dustin: Redskins- RG3, MNF, WIN. Redskins – 35, Giants – 31.

Cameron: Redskins – I don’t like the Giants, that’s number one. Number two, RG3 is the best thing in football since the forward pass was discovered. RG3 – 28, Giants – 21.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s